Looking back on my recital, I see the cycle of Doubt and Hope again. Right after the recital ended, I was left with even more questions. My performance was below my accepting standard, and I couldn’t blame the accident either. I was deeply frustrated with the outcome and began to questioned myself as a musician.

Having take my time-off, I’m able to see things clearer. I’m aware that I’m not quite successful in playing this time. However, I’m glad I have learnt this challenging programme because at least it forced me to really push myself. I have learnt a lot along the way; for example, time management, importance of mental well-being, multi-tasking, prioritisation and poster design. Most importantly, I learnt to accept failure as part of professional development.

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I have received quite positive comments from PGVIM friends, friends from different institute, and international jury.

 

For audience of my age, they thought the message of my recital to be relatable, and it really resonated with them. Many enjoyed the performance, commenting on its “elegance and nuance.” Juries found the concept strong and the narration (recitation and video) coherent to the concept. Yet, many have commented on the direction of the concept and my playing. One suggested I even split up Beethoven’s Sonata as I did with Ravel’s. Another thought this recital represented immateriality and fleeting quality of life,  which he approved, but not with Beethoven’s last movement by adding that it could have more earthly quality. Both group of audience also praised the program note.

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I think my recital wasn’t as bad as I had felt. At least the message was well received and delivered elegantly with the help of my friends and teachers, which is crucial not only as a part of presentation but also as a process. I didn’t want this recital to be only about me, and I think I succeeded in that regard.